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Friday, February 19th, 2010 - 4:19 pm EST

John Edwards, two-time presidential candidate

Now that the first wave of Snowpocalypse 2010 is over, here's a Profile in Competence of former presidential candidate/current media-pilloried cad John Edwards.

Name: John Edwards

Occupation: Former U.S. Senator (NC), two-time presidential candidate, director of the Center on Poverty, Work and Opportunity at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

Career Highlights:
The son of a mill worker, Edwards was the first person in his family to attend college and, presumably, law school. Made his name as a "plaintiff's lawyer" in medical lawsuits, possibly using his mill working heritage to his advantage in doing so. He turfed Lauch Faircloth out of his Senate seat in 1998, and immediately began considering a run at the presidency, but still took the time to reassure voters that, yes, his father worked in a mill. Ran for president in 2004 and was initially favored due to his looks and charm - indeed, when this writer was in college, he attended a political roundtable discussion where all the participants talked about for upwards of thirty minutes was how handsome and Kennedy-esque John Edwards was. He lost, ultimately, and bided his time with other political work until 2008, when he ran again and lost. It also came out that he fathered an child with a longtime mistress, despite being married to a woman so sympathetic to his political ambitions that she campaigned with him when not undergoing chemotherapy. Nonetheless, it is still true that his father worked in a mill.

Dominant Pattern(s): Driver and Collaborator. John's combination of charm and ambition is potent to the point of volatile. He knows how to get people to like and feel comfortable with him quickly, a skill essential to swaying juries and campaigning for office. And he's enough of a shark to climb the ladder and profit from these social advantages.

Recommendation(s) for Improvement: Organizer. John's ambition gets in his way; he's so busy achieving that he has trouble staying focused on more immediate tasks. It's worth considering that he wasn't elected because voters got the sense that, with nothing higher to shoot for than the presidency, he wouldn't know what to do with himself. John has to learn to stick to things, and what better time to learn than the inescapable disgrace of the present? Turn on some Bach and start the morning off with Diaphragm Circles. Reorganize the office. Lay out the desk like a props table and make sure everything has a place. Meditate. Get your life together.